


Teardrops are falling

by loonymischief



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marauders - Fandom
Genre: Gen, M/M, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:53:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29839062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loonymischief/pseuds/loonymischief
Summary: Sirius Black one shots for all Sirius' simps out there. Romantic one shots are mainly going to be wolfstar but may mix it up every now and then.
Relationships: Sirius Black & James Potter, Sirius Black/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Marlene McKinnon, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 1





	Teardrops are falling

**Author's Note:**

> Comment requests

Sirius sat on the cold, eternally damp stone floor of his cell. He stared at his bent knees, "How long have I been sitting like this?" he thought to himself. An hour? Several hours? A day? These were the _fascinating_ thoughts that occupied Sirius now. But after eight years he had grown used to them. Eight years, eight years since Lily and James' murder. Harry would've turned nine a few months ago. Sirius closes his eyes and tries to picture the little boy now. All he can picture is a faint outline of a boy with dark hair and the height and scrawny build of the 11 year old James Potter that Sirius met all those years ago.

 _This_ is how he's celebrating his thirtieth birthday. Alone and staring out at the never ending dark sea that surrounds Azkaban, thinking about the days before his incarnation. The rest of the world had worked hard and moved on from the days of Voldemort, the death eaters...and him. No one thought of Sirius now. No one thought of the 'murderer' locked away in Azkaban. But there was a time, a time when people cared about him. Sirius recalled ten years ago, on his 20th, when James had the Order surprise him. It was an over the top surprise that Lily definitely didn't have time to check. Sirius was genuinely so startled he would have stunned them all right there and then had it not been for Remus snatching his wand from him in time . Sirius smiled feebly to himself recalling this. Over the past eight years he had greatly resisted thinking of such things; the treasured memories from before that brought him so much sadness but so much joy. As the moment he let them in, the dementors came for him, tortured him, leaving him feeling empty and broken. Each time left him worse than before. But today, he couldn't help it, he lets those thoughts in. Not only does he think back to the times just before his incarnation, where his time with Harry meant more to him than anything, but to his years at Hogwarts.Sirius stared up into the empty sky and tried his hardest to picture home, Hogwarts. The bright lights in the castle were like a beacon at night. He longed to walk through those gates again, with his friends by his side. His _true_ friends. The image of Peter still sparked so much anger in his heart and his skin burned. 

It takes Sirius a while to calm himself, compose himself. Groaning, he stretches out his legs and reclines against the uncomfortable wall. It does no good to think of Peter he surmises. It does no good to think of the past at all really, but he has to. It's the only thing that keeps him going. It both destroys and sustains him. He turns his mind back to the castle. After all, that was were most of his best memories occurred. It was his first proper home and those he met there were his proper family. The redhead schooling them all, the kid with the glasses cracking him up....the boy with the scars making him blush. Sirius's eyes fluttered open and up at the crescent moon in the sky. Every time the moon shines this bright his mind goes to Remus. Locking his eyes upon the beautiful light, he allows himself to be transported to this day 15 years ago. All the images of his past seem vague or fuzzy but this is the one that never does. The image of Remus's bright red blush and the snow in his lashes and hair is burned into Sirius's brain.

* * *

They'd been walking from Hogsmeade, despite the snow falling they were both radiating warmth from the butterbeer and full stomachs provided by the three broom sticks.

"I'm sorry this has been such a rotten birthday, Sirius." Remus mused stuffing his hands in his coat pocket.

"Rotten?"

Remus shrugged "Yeah well, with Merrythought giving you detention for tomorrow, James accidentally incinerating a bunch of your gifts, Peter in the hospital wing-"

"Well that was expected, he ate most of the chocolates I got for _my_ birthday, _his_ breakfast, part of _my_ birthday breakfast, _his_ lunch, part of _my_ birthday lunch, his usual amount of day to day snacks and _then_ James made him go flying." Sirius lists with a snort. "He'll be throwing up 'til tomorrow then he'll be grand ." 

"I suppose, but also James and Lily missed most of the day being in detention." 

"I never thought i'd see the day Evans got a detention. They've barley started to be friends and James is already a destructive influence." Sirius joked with a shrug. He was used to crappy birthdays at home, but here he at least knew he was cared about. Even if his friends were idiots. "It's really fine, it's been fun with just the two of us." He nudged Remus with an elbow. Remus shot him a grateful smile and Sirius found himself staring a Remus a moment longer. The setting sun created a majestic silhouette for him and is brown hair had fallen onto his forehead slightly. Sirius had the urge to reach over and stroke it off his face but he resisted. Instead he tucked he freezing hands up into his jumper sleeves. This had become a regular thing for them really, they shared free periods every Friday afternoon and would always use that time to walk to Hogsmeade. Sometimes they'd bring their work to one of the quieter inns, but mainly they would just walk and talk for hours. They ambled back slowly and in comfortable silence. 

The sun had fallen quickly and stars had already started to appear "It's getting so dark so quickly now." Remus commented walked through the woods past the shrieking shack.

"Mhh" Sirius agreed, noting how Remus stared hard at the ground until the shack was behind them. "The stars are already so bright" He added craning his neck back. But apparently not so bright that Remus saw the patch of ice before them as he lost his foot and was suddenly sliding down and backwards into a tree. Sirius, caught by surprise, burst into laughter but immediately ran after him. He was chortling so hard he couldn't breath. Sirius skidded next to Remus and, gripping the tree for stability, offered him his cold hand. Remus gripped it and pulled himself up. Standing face to face their boisterous laughter died down to awkward chuckles as they remained holding hands. Remus's cheeks started to glow, Sirius could see even in the growing darkness, but Sirius still didn't let go.

"Your hands are so warm." He mused, placing both of his hands around Remus's glove to warm himself.

"I told you to bring a pair of gloves." Remus scolded playfully, shyly.

"Well-" Before Sirius could finish his rebuttal he was cut off by Remus's lips pressed swiftly but firmly against his. Sirius blinked back in surprise whilst Remus blushed profusely and did the most awkward and tiny smile. The scars on his lips even seem to become tiny and shy. His hair covered with freshly fallen snow. 

That, that is the image Sirius has burned into his brain. He could see it as clearly now as he had 15 years ago. The image that no one can take from him.

He rarely lets himself cry but a single tear streaks down on Sirius' moonlight face. Eight years, eight years and Remus has never come, never written, never send word. Sirius doesn't know where he is, what he's doing or if he's okay. Sirius pushes the darkest thoughts aside and assures himself the ministry has probably not allowed people to visit him, that's why Remus... or anyone hasn't come. Sirius's eyes flick away from the moon in the sky and more tears slip out. Sirius feels a sudden cold take over him, his tears become like shards of glass. A dementor glides by his cell, pausing only for a moment in consideration before gliding away.

"That's right", Sirius mutters bitterly "I don't need _your_ help to feel broken inside." He jokes to himself, his voice cracking.

He clenches his eyes to stop the tears flowing. They've not allowed visitors or letters, that's why no has ever come. It's _not_ because Remus doesn't believe his innocence. Or, even worse, it's not because he doesn't care.


End file.
